6/30/2024 - I was sick during this summer national and did not do well in pools in Division 1 and Junior Women's Epee. I faced tougher opponents in direct elimination.
How can I win against a tough opponent, especially in bad physical conditions? My coach told me a long time ago: create your own moment. Watch my full bout here: https://youtu.be/ZVWGfOxftgc
6/8/2024 - Today, I moderated a panel discussion with Rishab and Kevin, two important mentors along my high-school journey.
Rishab J. Harvard'27 - Make some genuine contributions
Kevin M. MIT'24 - Don't let hyper-optimization disrupt your journey, trust your curiosity
I learned so much from them since I first connected with them. A little bit more about the event: https://youtu.be/YiqWeuIJKE8
5/17/2024 - The ISEF week in May at Los Angeles has been an exciting and emotional week. "meeting like-minded peers" transformed to be some fun moments and beautiful memories with friends.
This is the second year I attended ISEF. Rather than finding the routines, I found more excitement. I did not get a grand award this year, but I found inner peace and long-term commitment. Do you believe that excitement and inner peace can co-exist?
3/18/2024 - 6 projects qualify for ISEF each year from our county. 3 engineering projects and 1 science project have already been announced. Only 2 more left. I started searching for remedies: I love my project; I learned so much during the process; I can continue it even without any recognition. Ultimately, it is beneficial for society. I should write a paper about my project...Before this list got any longer, my name was called! I qualified for ISEF again!
The best thing I took away from tonight’s awards ceremony is responsibility. It is a great honor to represent our county again. ISEF is a great opportunity to raise awareness of routine brain-wellness monitoring, so that many brilliant minds can join this journey with me. Many things yet to be done. It is a new start, not the end of my project.
1/22/2024 - I was filling out the baggage delay form, with my first fencing bag left at RIC and my second fencing bag left at DWF. I was exhausted but smiled. This weekend-trip was definitely a special one for me - I earned my B rating. For a long time, I was stuck at a C rating: C22 and C23. There were times that I fenced and won against solid A-rated fencers but lost to an unrated fencer. There were times that I catch-up from 9-14 to 14-14, only to lose the last touch. There were times that I asked myself, did you work hard enough? I always come back to the fundamental reasons that I got into fencing. I stopped looking at the results and started to re-pick up the original joy of fencing. Now my brain seems to find its own consciousness, without the rating, the winning or losing, just that moment of joy of fencing. B is good, a goal of A rating and moving to the top on NRP is also good. But this moment of joy seems much more precious. I hope to keep it along my fencing journey.
I decided to keep my blog the same name: C-fencer’s blog. C, for consistent, courage, continuous efforts. Now, I am adding one more - consciousness.
12/30/2023 -
Summer saunters across the cerulean sky,
gilding the walls a golden white.
The brisk breeze brushes busily by,
floating flowers that flutter out of sight.
Fall flits over the leaf-littered ground,
dusting the treetops with honeyed glow.
The distant drizzle dashes discreetly down,
weightlessly whispering against my window.
Winter wanders under empty oaks,
granting the air a crisp glaucous gray.
The cutting cold careens capriciously close,
slipping silently into the room where I lay.
Spring swirls through sun-streaked air,
brushing the bushes into colored bloom.
The plethora of plants play pleasingly there,
softly singing from across the room.
Through my window I observe all these things,
all these changes that time brings.
12/10/2023 -
Damon the cat,
Who never thinks he is a pet,
Who, like an old man, watches sunrises year-round from the dining room window
While the boring humans hassle in and out.
Damon the builder,
Who has only his claws
Who, like a young boy, builds fantastical castles in which he lives
With cardboard for walls and my homework for tiles.
Damon the explorer,
Who loves the outdoors,
Who, like an ancient knight, makes friends from outside with his meowing songs
Slaying fearsome lizards who’ve forgotten how to breathe fire.
Damon the trust lender,
Who rolls on on the floor on his back,
Who, rubbing his head against my leg, purrs all night
Pampered like a king in his luxurious bed.
Damon the cat,
Not just a cat or a pet,
But the breeze in our humid summer nights,
And the voice at our door demanding food in our mornings.
Inspired by my lovely cat Damon, who joined our family when he was 4-weeks old.
11/2/2023
“Be patient, create your own moment!” As the clock ticked on the fencing stripe with 50 seconds left, my coach shouted behind me, with a firmly calm yet energy injecting voice. It is the 3rd year in my epee fencing journey. Many times, I did not understand. Is it contradictory to the basic physics laws? We are in the same time zone, same location, same universe, how can I have my “own moments”? Do we all share the same reality? At a clear disadvantage fencing a strong A-rated fencer 10cm taller and double my age, should I just accept the defeat, learn something, and move-on? Even if there may be some special secret moments, should I “discover” it rather than “create” it?
But within that 50 seconds, I got it! Laser focused, I am holding full faith into my strategy, yet stay water-ish flexible, ready to switch strategy in any nano second. A “parry 6” is not just a typical technique, it opens 100+ possibilities following. My mind is like a creek running through a forest, delightfully changing direction, discovering the best path, and creating a meaningful water pathway behind me. The magic moment is CREATED and my opponent is invited to follow. 15:12, I won over the seemingly-unbeatable fencer. Since then, I enjoyed “creating my own moments” of tranquility and melody out of many fierce competitions, not only in fencing, but in many challenging yet meaningful endeavors
10/2/2023 - The sunlight dances across the unique texture of the exterior of deYoung Museum. Shadows cast by trees contrast the shimmering bronze.
Since November of 2022, I have been a C-rated fencer. Countless bouts have gone by where my internal gut reaction after saluting and saying "good bout" was regretting not doing better or stewing over a few bad moves.
While each loss that could have been a new rating or more national points is frustrating, in the grand scheme of things there is so much more to experience: more bright, glimmering bronze with only a few patches of shadow.
7/14/2023 - Watching a club mate fence on the finals strip, 5 points behind his opponent who is one touch away from victory, I feel tension and pressure. He hits one touch after another, never rushing. Point by point, he evens the score, leaving them both one touch away from victory. With the same calm confidence, he attacks and scores one more touch, winning the match.
I've encountered similar situations many times, though not with such high stakes, and I'm sure many fencers have as well. In those moments, you can either be rushed and give in to the pressure or acknowledge those feelings and move on to think about the bout. This summer nationals I reinforced the feeling and mindset of going touch by touch on a small scale to achieve a much bigger goal.
4/14/2023 - Maybe you've heard of the acronym , "STEAM" before: Science, Technology, Engineering, Art, and Math. One of these things is not like the others...
I believe that art shouldn't be categorized in the same way as STEM fields. While it is an independently interesting field, for me its value comes in the wide applications across various STEM fields. The research paper is published, the numbers have been crunched, and the studies have been completed--but there's still something missing. Art can be the factor that pushes a STEM project into the public eye and transform it into something accessible to everyone. Art can inspire youth to pursue paths of STEM through moving narratives. Art isn't just an add-on to STEM. It can bring STEM to life.
P.S. - Today, our science project SEL-PET, a children friendly art inspired science research project was recognized the Project-of-the-Year in CSEF.
2/3/2023 - As an E-rated fencer, there is newness and a sense of possibility ahead. As an A-rated fencer, you'e achieved so much and can grow starting from a high point.
As a C-Rated fencer between A and E, I sometimes struggle to see the possibilities ahead and the progress I've made. My victories fall just short of bringing another rating, and my losses only cause me to feel like I don't even deserve a C. Taking a look at the bigger picture, this period of struggle is only one part of the experience. Even though I don't see the improvement day-by-day, I can push myself to continue, to practice the new and the old over and over until I make it past this section and into the next.
